I'm kicking this LJ and from now on I'll be updating here under the name 'firebrand_faux'.
If you still give a shit, please add me to your F-list.
Cheers guys.
Feeling:  drunk Noises provided by: Stabbing Westward - waking up beside you |
...I wasn't even using the search term 'Jew' but rather 'Zionist'. It is my understanding that most Jews would wish to put a million light years between themselves and the Zionist movement but still I get this search result:
An explanation of our search results.
If you recently used Google to search for the word "Jew," you may have seen results that were very disturbing. We assure you that the views expressed by the sites in your results are not in any way endorsed by Google. We'd like to explain why you're seeing these results when you conduct this search.
A site's ranking in Google's search results is automatically determined by computer algorithms using thousands of factors to calculate a page's relevance to a given query. Sometimes subtleties of language cause anomalies to appear that cannot be predicted. A search for "Jew" brings up one such unexpected result.
If you use Google to search for "Judaism," "Jewish" or "Jewish people," the results are informative and relevant. So why is a search for "Jew" different? One reason is that the word "Jew" is often used in an anti-Semitic context. Jewish organizations are more likely to use the word "Jewish" when talking about members of their faith. The word has become somewhat charged linguistically, as noted on websites devoted to Jewish topics such as these:
* http://shakti.trincoll.edu/~mendele/vol01/vol01.174
* http://www.jewishworldreview.com/cols/jonah081500.asp
Someone searching for information on Jewish people would be more likely to enter terms like "Judaism," "Jewish people," or "Jews" than the single word "Jew." In fact, prior to this incident, the word "Jew" only appeared about once in every 10 million search queries. Now it's likely that the great majority of searches on Google for "Jew" are by people who have heard about this issue and want to see the results for themselves.
Our search results are generated completely objectively and are independent of the beliefs and preferences of those who work at Google. Some people concerned about this issue have created online petitions to encourage us to remove particular links or otherwise adjust search results. Because of our objective and automated ranking system, Google cannot be influenced by these petitions. The only sites we omit are those we are legally compelled to remove or those maliciously attempting to manipulate our results.
We apologize for the upsetting nature of the experience you had using Google and appreciate your taking the time to inform us about it.
Sincerely,
The Google Team
p.s. You may be interested in some additional information the Anti-Defamation League has posted about this issue at http://www.adl.org/rumors/google_search_rumors.asp. In addition, we call your attention to Google's search results on this topic.
No, I am not interested in any additional information that the ADL has to offer... thanks anyway.
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Honey, I don't know if you'll ever read this as I'm aware I was dumped from your F-list some time ago. You're angry at me and I can understand that. My intention was not to destroy you - far from it, after all, I was the one who tried to throw you together in the beginning. I thought you'd be good for eachother... I was wrong. He's done nothing but lie to you, disrespect you and generally make an ass of himself. I just happened to bear witness to all of this. He made me angry while we were together and he makes me angry now. I thought long and hard about whether I was doing the right thing and I don't like hurting people. But if you could have heard the way he was disrespecting you and the way he bragged, I think you'd understand why I did what I did.
All that's left to say now is that I don't know what he confessed but I'll bet it's only a tiny fraction of the whole story. But this is no longer my business. I want nothing more to do with the guy and I'm not going to walk around rubbing salt in the wounds. I have my own plans for my own life - plans which don't involve being a part of any of this, that don't involve this place, this time or these people. Maybe I'm a bitch... maybe he's a bigger one. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.
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I think some sort of will to battle my way out of this hole is finally starting to emerge. There's lots to be done and it's difficult to know where to even start, but I will start.
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Amidst the confusion and clutter that arises from the construction of compressors and tube EQs, it has been decided that I just want a battery operated fishfinger that goes through doorways backwards.
Amen, sister... amen.
Feeling:  exanimate |
| » Quel surprise... |
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...Jowe has the new hairs again ;)
Et voila:
Other than this, news is as follows:
1) Return to Bristol delayed indefinitely. Will catch up with you anon.
2) Will see the 'family' on Friday, with a bit of luck and very much looking forward to it too.
3) Hormones still running riot.
Fin.
Sep. 18th, 2006 @ 07:40 pm
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| » Jesus loves you |
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Storm says "I'm not writing fucking livejournal shit for the gossip mill."
Comprendez?
Amen.
Sep. 15th, 2006 @ 11:03 pm
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| » Mild Synaesthesia and the rest. |
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An abundance of misfiring synapses that merely create noise rather than serve communication
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All my problems and anxiety can be reduced to a chemical imbalance or some kind of misfiring synapses. I need to get help for that. But I'll still be ugly though. Nothing's going to change that.
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Clinical psychology says that deja vu is misfiring synapses.
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Who’s to say that the misfiring synapses or chemical imbalances aren’t the result of a spiritual attack of some sort?
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Synaesthesia is a weird phenomenon where your senses are fucked-up; you hear smells, see sounds, and feel images. Apparently it’s due to misfiring synapses in your brain, so the information from your eyes gets fed to the part of the cerebellum that deals with aural information as well as where it’s supposed to go, for instance. The results vary; at the mild end some people will “see” letters or numbers in their mind’s eye as being certain colours.
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Why can’t our silly hearts ignore whichever other silly hearts don’t like them… or those connected to heads with misfiring synapses that fuck everything up?
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Let's just lay it all at the altar of misfiring synapses, amok biochemicals and horrendous childhoods.
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Disorders of the senses (hallucinations) and sudden urgent feelings of anger or fear can all be traced, at least in neurophysiological theory, to misfiring synapses in one area or another of the sensory association cortex or of the limbic system, which controls mood.
Sep. 12th, 2006 @ 03:19 am
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| » Wiggle it. |
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I thought I'd deviate from the usual 'as seen on LJ' Infest photos. Here are three little snippets of a dull weekend:
In other news, I'm rockin' the vegan cookery once again and about to embark on a business venture that's been many times delayed. Also want to pass on a big, squishy congrats to Snowwy and Keef - hoorah!!!
Sep. 11th, 2006 @ 08:22 pm
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| » Holy Hell |
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Is it this cold in Bristol too?! It's gorgeous-sunny but I'm wearing two T-shirts and a jumper and I'm still turning purple!
Withdrawal from my meds has finally subsided and on that front at least, I'm feeling much better. My 'possible PCOS' is still proving to be a bitch, however. I at least only have a week or so to go before they can do another blood test... just have to keep my fingers crossed that they don't fuck this one up as well.
I'm not sure if my meds were masking certain symptoms or if my hormonal issues are just worsening, but I've now found that I'm completely intolerant to dairy and sugar is fucking me up far more than usual. Still, this is no biggie - just means a return to veganism is called for and I'm actually quite happy about that. I should never have gotten out of the habit in the first place!
That's it. Summary concluded. Have a nice day.
Sep. 8th, 2006 @ 09:04 am
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| » the things we do for... whatever. |
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Have to say, Infest was a huge let down so far as I'm concerned. Wasn't really feeling the vibe at all. Still, 'Autoclav 1.1' kicked arse, rocked my socks and whatever else you care to mention :) Would have been nice to catch up with people to a greater extent but things always conspire against us.
On the withdrawal front I seem to be levelling out a little. Total head-fuckery ensues but the physical symptoms are lessening. This is a good thing, if you've not been there, just trust me on that!
Pickle some eggs - it needs to be done.
Aug. 29th, 2006 @ 08:04 am
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| » detoxifimication and the withdrawalers |
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Well, it's safe to say that this is getting messy! I've not had such a queen pickle head for an age but I still do believe that this is worth doing.... I think! Of coures, this is going to make the weekend's excursion to Incest something of an experiment in insanity. I have no idea how I'm going to hold up and if I'll be able to resist the pull of certain pills and potions. I have no idea if my head will just implode or something similar. Hopefully, I'll be able to resist the urge to tear people's heads off with my bare hands ;) So, if you see me in sunny Bradford, be nice and if you can't be nice, be sure not to step on my toes :P
Hope everyone's well, see some of ya soon.
Aug. 23rd, 2006 @ 12:19 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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See me wave very weakly at the world.... see? Right there. That itsy bitsy hand gesture. I'm gonna get there and I'm gonna be better for it. Just you wait and see.
In the meantime, have an interlude.
......
......
......
Aug. 21st, 2006 @ 10:01 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didnt have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends im a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"
---IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS
Aug. 14th, 2006 @ 08:19 pm
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| » raining cats and dogs |
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My parents and God.
Neither of them exist but the difference is that nobody ever fought a war over my parents :)
So, I am still alive - very much so actually. Alive and existing somewhere just outside Mansfield where life moves at a nice slow pace so as not to cause any nervous breakdowns.
If I were going to apologise for being happy at the moment, I guess now would be the time. However, I don't really feel the inclination.
Hope life's treating you all well, wherever you may be.... Sin, my dearest, as for you, I hope life's treating you ever-so-fucking-well and if it isn't, you have my permission to beat the crap out of it, reduce it to a soup like consistency and feed it to the masses. Amen to that, sister :)
Aug. 12th, 2006 @ 03:59 pm
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| » For the love of monkeys... |
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...why won't my body let me sleep?
I'm a giant, hallucinating ache. My aches are aching and my hallucinations are hallucinating. I would sacrifice the lives of every small child on the face of the earth for a long, blissful sleep.
Aug. 3rd, 2006 @ 07:17 am
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| » Again with the bandwagon. |
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Whilst I wait for inspiration to arrive back from its vacation, have the ( ages meme )
Aug. 2nd, 2006 @ 02:38 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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My creative instinct has now left the building.
Aug. 2nd, 2006 @ 02:19 pm
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| » Free bird. |
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Aug. 1st, 2006 @ 10:50 pm
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